English, 111 (Fourth of July)

I want you to write in complete sentences 10 steps on how to pick out the perfect Fourth of July party. Use humor, but let's remember to be polite.






Throwing a party can be very stressful. Careful planning and attention to detail can often help smooth any wrinkles. Parties celebrating important national events can be particularly difficult, as you definitely want to impress that nosy Mrs. Carmichael next door for fear of being the topic of gossip for the rest of the summer. The bint has to keep herself busy somehow, but it isn't your obligation to occupy her.

The first step of avoidance is to decide what you are celebrating. Since this is the Fourth of July, the original publish date for Alice's Adventures in Wonderland in 1865, you would not want to bust out your conifer trees nor make the social faux pas of allowing your slaves to join you and your guests at the table. Instead, particularly if you are unfamiliar with the holiday, you may want to research it a bit. A quick Google search can teach you many things about a myriad of topics, just be sure to stay focused and to take everything you read online with a grain of salt; not everything you find is guaranteed to be valid practice.

Once you've garnered enough basic knowledge, it is a smart tactic to decide upon your theme. There are many wonderful themes one could choose for such a joyous holiday. A simple grazing of the novel is ample fodder for original and entertaining festivities. Your party could be Unbirthday themed, croquet with you as the lovely Queen, an enchanting living garden complete with decorated female quartet serenading your guests, or even a resplendently cultured raw bar complete with baby oysters and knives made from walrus tusks. Be creative and have fun!

Lists are always important when preparing for your pièce de résistance. Write down all the essentials for your party, and the non-essentials. This list will keep you on track, as well as help remind you of the basics you may forget when being swept up in the details. No one cares how awesome your ice sculpture of Emerald City is if it's the only liquid available for consumption.

Often times people require sustenance to enjoy themselves, hence “Eat and be merry”. Your food choices should flatter your theme. Luckily, the world of Wonderland has many fantastic items you can incorporate into your layout; just make sure it fits the overall theme you've started running with and the items complement each other. Small details, like a carrot cake styled like the White Rabbit's home with body parts poking from the windows or a red velvet replica of the Queen's castle complete with cards and a croquet match will wow your guests.

After you have the food choices, you must pick drinks to go along with it. If you're serving oysters, most recommend to accompany with white versus red wine. Wine is right out for a children's party, unless you also offer non-alcoholic alternatives. Young people are very difficult to deal with when drunk. A good rule of thumb is to always have a wide variety of drinks appropriate for all ages.

Now that you have the full attention of your guests, fat with the delicious treats you've laid out for their splendor, what will you do to prevent a riot when your food inevitable runs out? The best way is to arrange for some entertainment. Maybe pay a real mad Hatter to come in and make personalized hats for your party goers. Book that Goth Metal Alice in Wonderland band you've been rocking on your iPod. Whatever you choose, make sure it fits for your party goers. You can only get your friends so drunk, and they'll never be far gone enough to enjoy a clown making balloon animals.

Acknowledging that by this point you should have a less than vague idea of the people attending your party, a quintessential part of party planning is to create a guest list. It not only helps you synthesize the steps above, but also sets quantity as well as a checklist for any special needs for guests. It also helps your security team know who can and cannot make it through the door to prevent any party crashers from spoiling your fun. Tip them extra if you feel like broken thumbs may be needed to get a point across.

The end of the party is the part people remember best. One of the best ways to cement your party in the hall of awesome parties is to pass out gift bags to your guests as they leave. Again, these bags should fit with your theme. Facial moisturizer and exfoliants may be nice for some, but have nothing to do with the upside down and fanatical world of Wonderland. Feel free to have the items range from inexpensive silly items to maybe one or two larger items the person will want to keep and help them remember the occasion.

Not all your guests will be in the proper condition to leave, which means it is up to you to be prepared to house such miscreants. Location of your party can help with this problem, especially for large numbers. Hotel rooms or your guest room can work for this situation, just be prepared to wash the sheets and remember to lock the doors of rooms you'd rather not have people potentially fornicate in.

The most important step is to remember to enjoy yourself. Many party planners forget this essential step and lose themselves in making everything perfect. Parties are meant to make everyone happy, and as long as you're enjoying yourself, so too will your guests.