English, 112 (Sexism in Print Advertisments)

I was mildly delirious while writing this. 

Research made me sick of the subject and frustrated with the world, so I threw something together. 

No real feminists were consulted in the writing of this rubbish.

This is about the Man, and how He's always trying to keep us Goddesses in our place with these stereotypical ads shoved down our throat. Everywhere you look, there is a Woman dressed like a china doll with Her face made up to perfection, a impossibly short dress barely covering Her sacred flower, and some awful Man-made pair of torture on Her feet. She's lusting after some gem, or some appliance, or some piece of chocolate. Lord forbid She could be someone practical. Improbable; She was born with a vagina and is the sole reason miserable Men are in existence. Here are just a few examples of the abuse of Man on Womankind that I'm sick and tired of putting up with.

Because women aren't well versed in manipulating knobs.

First is the over used and abused bimbo routine. In His effort to demoralise Us, they constantly skew our soft femininity as some equivalent to intellectual inferiority. This ad focuses on Her lost expression and Her lip bite is a subtle commentary on how a Man doesn't want to listen to His woman to speak, just look pretty for Him to look at. Offensive and outrageous insinuations such as this set Women up as objects to be mocked and ridiculed as if they are so below a Man they can't even drive properly.

Well, when you put it that way ...

More insulting undertones about how Women are merely materialistic and only want a Man who can take care of them with His money. I am here to say that this Goddess' legs are crossed no matter how many shiny baubles are thrown at me. I am not your tawdry whore, I am a Woman of empowerment! My womb is the chalice of life and as its carrier I demand respect from the chauvinistic pigs who think they can control Me, otherwise you can keep a'steppin' Mr. Moneybags!

A real man wears fancy shoes when
he curb stomps his bitches.

There is too much wrong with this ad for Me to even form cohesive sentences, I need to go relax with some lychee green tea to collect my chakra before continuing on. First off, how does this even appeal to a buyer about shoes? “All the better to kick your face in, my dear, so get to polishing.” What sadistic sack of sad human conceived this contrived ads is beyond me, but I hope you got one of those loafers to the face.

One would think in a modern age that the Mother Goddess would be shown true respect for the Gift She gives to the world via Her body, and yet We are still besmirched by the oppressive puerile mentality of the Men around Us. Here's to empowering Ourselves to step up and protest when He tries to bring us down with immature and insulting propaganda against vaginas!