I am mad.

A reporter wrote about the issues my father has had getting the case file on my brother's death. I am an idiot, so I read the comments. It enraged me to the point of finding each person that upset me and giving them a piece of my mind. I know it won't really change anything, but I can't just let them go on without realising that their comments do have an affect on other people. Even just reading my comments I can see myself go from irate to depressed.

I really hate this feeling.

To Stone__Cold: "Do you just spend your life getting off to other people's misery? All you do is make asshole commentary about the misfortune of others. Most people are risky in life, even when you plan for every possibility things can catch you off guard. Some risks are bigger than others, some are tiny things you do every day and don't even perceive the danger in them anymore. You could fall and snap your neck every time you step in the shower, even if you take precautions, but that doesn't mean you aren't going to do it.

I hope you find a better place in your life that you don't need to mock those less fortunate than yourself to placate your personal issues."

To Archie Caldwell: "You posted on an article about my brother's death. The comments were turned off so I couldn't reply to you. I wanted to remind you that real people are affected by the asinine comments you make. He was a 19-year-old kid who went drinking with his friends and expected to take a cab home, of course he didn't have a damn reflective belt with him. As an ex-military member, I now always carry my issued reflective belt with me purely out of reaction to what happened to him. Do you always have one on you? Just in case, you never know when you might have to walk down the road.

Oh, and he was wearing a bright red jacket. I know, because it was given to him for Christmas and it was one of my favourites. He wore it the day I graduated from Basic Military Training. That was the last time I saw him before he died.

So thanks for your comments. They really made my day."

To Balor: "You posted on an article about my brother's death. The comments were turned off so I couldn't reply to you. I wanted to remind you that real people are affected by the asinine comments you make. He was a 19-year-old kid who went drinking with his friends and expected to take a cab home. It was 3 AM and Aurora is a relatively small town. It was raining that night and the side of the road there is all mud. Like most 19-year-olds, he had some silly sneakers that he probably didn't want to get dirty. He was wearing a bright red jacket and another driver, who came across him before the taxi,  commented on seeing him and his friend on the road. There are four lanes on that road, if the driver had been paying attention and not speeding, he should not have hit my brother.

19-year-olds are dumb. They think they are invincible. He wasn't drunk, he was just being a kid who thinks he is the centre of the universe and that the world will bend around him. He was smart, kind, and fucking hilarious. You wouldn't believe how many people came to his funeral, all of them expressing how fucking wonderful he was. He may not have been slotted to change the world, but it sure as hell wasn't "natural selection." It was hubris, which is something we all share as a member of the human race. We're imperfections that live life to hopefully fix some of our flaws, and he didn't even get the chance to try."

To Christine Stevenson: "You mention "having a heart" in your post. It seems like you need to reassess what that means. There is a potential to die in every action you perform, to say that he could have not gone out, or if he had left with a five minute difference would have changed the outcome is stupid speculation. Death is part of life, but it doesn't mean you have to mock the deaths of those who don't mean something to you personally. It means you respect the life of another as if it were your own. Especially when you have no idea what you're talking about."

I'm still angry, but I feel mildly better now.